This week’s Spin Cycle assignment is “creative writing.”
You have no idea how much I froze up when I read that.
You see, I automatically interpreted it as “write something fictitious” and the whole idea just gave me a great raging case of the hives; while I’m creative in many areas of my life, writing isn’t one of them. Oh, I can tell a story – make it funny, even – but I didn’t start blogging because I’m some sort of frustrated, undiscovered Alice Walker wannabe. I don’t have The Great American Novel languishing away in a trunk somewhere just waiting for me to take it out, dust it off, spruce it up and send it off to some lucky publisher to earn me a million dollars.
Believe me, I’ve tried. And I’ve found that while I love reading fiction, I can’t write it worth squat.
Then I read Pseudo’s creative spin cycle – an extremely interesting poem – and realized “Ahhhh – I’m off the hook! It doesn’t necessarily have to be ficiton!” Until I realized that I suck even worse at poetry.
It appears the extent of my creative writing is observing, during a Yahoo Instant Message conversation with Oldest Son, that in regards to a certain salesman I know, “You could slap his brain down on the head of a pin and it would just roll around like a B.B. on a six lane highway.”
Because I have mastered the art of the Creative Insult.
So, keeping all of this in mind, I submit to you the Jan’s Sushi Bar version of Creative Writing:
Have a lovely Wednesday, y’all.