You People Are Out To Kill Me

[Fade In.  The G Man has gone home and I’m perusing the internet while The Young One hunts for a snack to supplement the huge dinner he just ate.]

Me:  Grooooooaaaaaaannnnn…

The Young One:  What’s the matter?

Me:  Someone has figured out how to make paleo Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies.

TYO:  This is a bad thing?

Me:  Yes, it’s a BAD thing!  I love Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies!  The rest of their stuff is crap, but the Oatmeal Creme Pies are ambrosial.  Ambrosial I tell ya!

TYO (stepping back a bit):  Oh, okay.

Me:  What, you don’t like Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies?

TYO:  They’re okay, I guess.  I’d rather have a Twinkie.  Let me know if someone makes a paleo Twinkie.

[Fade out.]

You know what?

They exist.


Oatmeal Creme PiesPhoto courtesy of The Unrefined Kitchen

10 thoughts on “You People Are Out To Kill Me”

  1. candy cigarettes i say. this is a problem as i see paleo/primal get more popular. people are finding ways to make “paleo” friendly versions of crap food. next, manufacturers are gonna capitalize and people will be walking out of their grocery store with “paleo friendly” goodies in a box. in the end, just because it doesn’t have gluten or HFCS, it doesn’t mean it is good for you. as long as people know this and eat accordingly they should be fine. unfortunately, many will not take the time to educate themselves enough to know when to call a spade a spade.

    oh well, i’ll get off my soapbox now.

    1. Agreed. Now, I’m the first person to admit that I have quite the collection of paleo “treats” on this site, but I’m also the first person to tell you they’re called “treats” for a reason. Because that’s what they are: something to be enjoyed once in awhile, not on a daily – or even regular – basis. You stay on that soapbox all you want, because it’s something we all need to hear.

      Now, I’m going to go and attempt to forget about the Oatmeal Creme Pies (the Twinkies aren’t a problem – blech).

    2. Hey Chuck,
      I do tend to agree with what you say. I think it’s really important that for people learning how to eat Paleo/Primal to stay away from the “junk” until they have a really solid grasp on what Paleo/Primal eating is all about. Even though the treats are definitely 1000x better than anything from the store, they’re still treats and not something that should be eaten every day.
      Having said that……I LOVED this post!!! It made me laugh because I could see myself sitting there saying the very same thing to my son and feeling the very same way. LOL!!! And then when I got to the part about the Twinkies existing, it was just toooo much. That was my absolute favorite junk food back in high school. Oh, the memories they bring back. So, I do think food like this has a place in a Paleo/Primal or Real Food diet, as long as it’s controlled, because sometimes you just need a treat that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy and, for me at least, it’s gotta’ be sweet and the gooeyer the better 🙂 Thanks Jan!!!

      1. i hate to hijack this thread but could someone explain pinterest to me. i’ve been there and heard how people love it. i guess i don’t understand it. what is the attraction?

        1. Oh, jeez – how the heck does one explain Pinterest? Two words describe it quite well: Time suck.

          Seriously, though – the concept is that it’s like a cork board, which the user creates and to which one “pins” interesting things found on the internet. You can have different “boards” for different subjects, and most people do. It’s handy for those situations where you go, “Oh, man – I found such-and-such on the web; where the heck was it?” It’s better than just bookmarking, because you can visually see the things you’ve pinned. What’s more, you can “follow” or subscribe to other user’s boards, see what they’ve pinned and then repin them to your boards. Or you can just peruse the site and see everything.

          I read somewhere (but can’t remember – how’s that for irony?) that the developers of Pinterest didn’t foresee what would happen: it has basically been taken over by women who primarily pin recipes, fashions, home decor ideas and crafts, although there are male users who pin things they find interesting. The thing I like most about it is that I can see all of the recipes from MY site that are being pinned, which gives me a good idea of trends and such.

          I hope this made sense.

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